


Testosterone.

by nerdfighter721



Series: Stand By Me [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Gen, IronDad and SpiderSon, Peter Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Trans Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-05-13
Packaged: 2020-03-02 09:12:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18808138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerdfighter721/pseuds/nerdfighter721
Summary: Peter Parker was on his last hope of finding a way to make testosterone stick around in his system with his Spider-Man metabolism -  if this doesn't work, he doesn't know what he'll do.





	Testosterone.

**Author's Note:**

> We pretend that Infinity War and Endgame never happened, so no spoilers.

Peter watched the clock as he waited for the bell to ring to signal that they could finally leave the classroom. He was aware that his teacher was still lecturing about some topic or another relevant to world history, but he didn’t care. It was Friday, and Friday’s meant that he got to go to Stark Industries. While he got to go three times a week, Monday’s, Wednesday’s, and Friday’s - Mr. Stark allowed Friday’s to be the day that Peter worked on his own project in the lab, while the other two days were dedicated to helping his mentor or doing superhero stuff.

Friday’s were important to Peter, though, because it was when he was working on trying to find a chemical mixture of testosterone that wouldn’t immediately be worthless with his metabolism. Last week, Peter thought he was _so close_ , and there was a chance that he finally got there, but he had to wait until he had his small lab to himself before he checked his T levels. He had been working at various mixtures for nearly three months now, this last mixture was his absolute last shot, but it had seemed pretty promising when he was testing it in a petri dish, so he was hopeful.

The bell rang and Peter was up and out of his seat, bag shouldered, before the rest of the class could even react. By the time he got to his locker, Ned was already waiting there, his classroom having been right next to their lockers, “Excited?” Ned grinned, when Peter skidded to a stop.

Peter nodded, “I really think I finally got it, Ned!” He opened up his locker and shoved his textbooks in there, “It all is just coming down to what my levels are looking like but-” Ned had, of course, already heard all of this, but he still nodded along with Peter, excited for him, “-but if it works…”

“It’ll work,” Ned said confidently, “You aren’t the youngest intern for Stark Industries for nothing.”

Rolling his eyes, Peter couldn’t help but smile as he shut his locker, “Hey nerds,” they both looked over as MJ came and joined them, adjusting the strap of her bag.

“Hey MJ,” They both responded, joining the crowd of students heading out, “How was your Spanish quiz.”

“Shit,” MJ responded, waving off Peter’s question, “Doesn’t matter, though. More important things to care about.”

“Like?” Ned questioned.

MJ shrugged, “Anything else.” They took a few steps before she continued, “What are you two up to on Sunday?”

Ned shook his head, and joked, “World domination, you know.”

Peter snorted as MJ looked over at him, a pointed look to let him know she was asking about Spider-Man stuff. It was still weird that MJ knew, she had cornered him one night while they were all hanging out at his apartment, after Ned had wandered off to the bathroom and she just came out and said “I know you’re Spider-Man”, Peter had tried to deny it, but MJ just shrugged him off and told him it was pretty obvious. She had explained how to she knew, which was mostly just her being _extremely_ perceptive of what Peter was up to, but he knew he couldn’t deny it any longer. Just as Ned came back, she promised not to tell anyone.

“Should be free,” Peter noted, “I’ll just have to let May know, I think she’s working a double on Sunday.”

MJ nodded, “I’ll pick you two up at four, then.” They had exited the school and she headed off with the raise of her middle finger, her loving salute to them.

Peter gestured towards the black car waiting for him, “Happy’s here. Guess I’ll see you Sunday?”

“Let me know how today goes?” Ned asked.

“Of course, I’ll text you as soon as I get the results.” Grinning, Peter and Ned did their handshake and off they went. Peter got into the car, and Happy watched him in the rearview mirror, “Hey Happy.” He grinned.

Happy nodded to him, “Got everything you need for lab day?”

Peter nodded, “Yeah, of course. I promised not to make that mistake again.” Two weeks ago, he had managed to forget his journal at the house where he was keeping his progress of his making of T, and had to beg Happy to drive him to the apartment to grab it. As per their usual drive though, Peter started to launch into telling Happy about his day, and when Happy got annoyed, he rolled up the window between them.

Tapping his fingers on his thighs, Peter found that he was starting to get nervous once things went silent. Everything was leaning on this new mixture working, and - if it didn’t - well, Peter didn’t know what he would do. There were only a handful of people who knew that Peter was trans, he was so lucky that May was the best Aunt in the whole world, and she contacted his school when he started high school and worked out his name change with the official systems. Of course, there were a few kids who knew him _before_ , but for the most part they didn’t care. The only one he ever worried about was Flash, who Peter knew would hold it over his head until the end of time, but Peter could deal with that. As much as Flash liked to threaten to let it out, Peter also knew he wouldn’t want to give up the biggest blackmail material he would ever have. Ned and MJ also knew, Ned knew him when he still went by his deadname, but he was also the _first_ person Peter came out to, and Ned switched with no problems whatsoever. One day, when their friendship was pretty clear it wasn’t going anywhere, Peter also dropped the bomb on MJ. MJ, unsurprisingly, took to it well. She made sure she was using the right pronouns and that was that.

In _this world_ , in the Superhero world, no one knew about him being trans. Peter couldn’t help but let his mind wander to his mentor finding out. His thoughts would run to the worst case scenarios, Tony taking away his suit, or worse, kicking Peter out of Stark Industries and never letting him come back. His heart started to stutter just thinking about it.

At some point, the window between them rolled back down, “Hey kid, we’re here.” Happy had turned in the seat to look at Peter.

“Wha- oh. Awesome, thank you Happy.” Peter said, and pretended not to notice the worried look on his face. Getting out of the car, Peter navigated up into the elevator, as Happy went off to do whatever it was that he needed to.

“Good afternoon, Peter,” FRIDAYs voice came when he got into the elevator, “Boss is in a meeting at the moment, but he said you can get started in your lab.”

Peter nodded, “Thank you, FRIDAY.” The elevator dropped him off on the floor and Peter made his way into his lab, nodding as he passed by Mr. War Machine. Once he got into his lab, he closed the door securely, “Hey FRIDAY, activate Hush Hush protocol.” It was thanks to Ned that Peter managed to make a new protocol in FRIDAY, he had already broken into Stark technology once, and said it was easier to do it a second time. It was simply to keep FRIDAY from telling Mr. Stark about what Peter was up to in his lab, or at least give him a viable excuse.

“Activating Hush Hush protocol,” FRIDAY repeated.

Nodding, Peter walked over to where he was keeping his chemicals and checked the testosterone that was left in the bottle, he hoped it was still in his system, but his mind was wandering again to wondering if it wasn’t.

_Stop_ , Peter scolded himself, _You’re going to be fine. It’s going to have worked. It_ has to _have worked._

His whole world was teetering on this coming back positive, his levels coming up like they should. Peter found himself pacing the room, the room was full of different chemicals he had been trying, all the mixtures that had previously failed. The final one that he hoped to work. At the start of this, he had so many ideas to work from. It didn’t matter if one didn’t work, he would have twenty other chances. Now, though, this was his final chance.

Finally, Peter froze in his place, silently shaking out his hands and going to the middle of the room, “I need to check my levels,” Peter told FRIDAY, “Give me estrogen and testosterone levels, and comparison to my levels last Friday.”

FRIDAY was silent for a second as she scanned him, and Peter closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Opening his eyes, he saw a screen showing his numbers from last week compared to this week, and he immediately collapsed to the floor, FRIDAY was reading off the information to him, but Peter needn't listen to his failure that was shining in his face.

All at once, tears started to stream down Peter’s face.

_Failure._

_Failure._

_Failure._

He would never be a boy. He had failed. He was a failure.

Putting his head in his hands, he let the tears fall freely for a some time, the word _failure_ just echoing away at him. When he looked up, the world cloudy from his tears, he was face to face with all his failed reactions. Not a single one worked. He was useless. He shouldn’t have even _tried_.

Everything came crashing to him and he couldn’t take it anymore, in a fit of rage he jumped up and screamed, taking all the vials that were sitting on a counter and throwing them all to the floor. He cursed and cried and yelled as he threw all his work on the floor with a shattering crash. Grabbing his notebook he ripped apart pages, throwing them to the floor watching all the work he’s spent so much time on slowly get saturated from his _failed_ mixtures.

“Pete?” The voice on the other side of the door barely registered in his mind, as he ripped pages, and destroyed as much as he could, “FRIDAY let me in - _god dammit_ \- this is fucking -  FRIDAY OVERRIDE WHATEVER PROTOCOL PUT ON YOU - CODE 3-5-2-1-3-9!”

When there was no paper left, Peter’s hands found the final vial, what had been his last hope and chucked it towards the door just as it opened, “WOAH!” Tony Stark called, ducking away from the vial, “Peter - what - what’s going on?” His mentor ran into the room as Peter’s leg gave out and he fell to the floor in a crumpled heap, tears streaming down his face as he gripped his hair and rocked back and forth.

There was some realization that Tony had put his arms around Peter, stopping him from rocking himself, Peter dropped his hands from his hair and let Tony hold him but refused to look at him. His face was soaked, he could feel where his jeans were soaked as well, from where he was sitting in a pile of failed chemicals, “What _happened_?” Tony’s voice was gentle, but Peter could hear the shake in his voice from worry.

Peter opened his mouth, but no words came out, just a pathetic gasping noise. Tony held him tighter, and stayed quiet for a minute, one of his hands were rubbing comforting circles on Peter’s arm. Peter was a rag doll at this point, his body leaning entirely on Tony for support, the only thing keeping him upright.

“ _F-failure_ ,” Peter finally stuttered out, “I’m a - a _failure_ , M-Mr. Stark. I’m _sorry_.”

“Hey,” Tony said, squeezing him closer, “Don’t say that, you aren’t a failure.”

Peter shook his head, “No, I - I am. I destroyed your lab and didn’t - didn’t even make what I _wanted_.”

“The lab can be cleaned,” Tony responded, “That doesn’t matter. What were you trying to make, Pete?”

A fresh stream of tears starting to come down his face, and he shook his head in Tony’s chest, “I - you’ll hate me.”

Tony chuckled, “I find that hard to believe kid, since we’re sitting in this chemical mess and it isn’t eating away at our skin, I’ll assume you weren’t making a weapon.”

“No,” Peter mumbled, “But - you - I lied to you - and - I’m _sorry_.”

“Stop saying your sorry Peter, you have nothing to be sorry for,” Tony told him, before gently taking him by his shoulders and pulling him away so he could look in his face. Peter, however, looked down at the ground, “ _Please_ Pete, tell me what you were trying to make. Who knows, I may even be able to help you.”

Peter shook his head, pulling out of Tony’s grip, “You - disappointed - wouldn’t want to - I should just go-” He started to make to move to stand and Tony grabbed a hold of him to keep him on the ground.

“Don’t you dare, kid.” Tony responded, “I promise, whatever you were making I won’t be mad at you. I just need you to _tell me_ . _Please._ ”

For the first time, Peter’s eyes caught and he saw the worry all over the older man’s face. Tony _cared_ about him and Peter destroyed his lab that Tony was letting him use. It occurred to Peter that he was looking at everything he could lose when he told Tony what he really was, and Peter couldn’t form his words correctly. He dropped his eyes and shook his head.

Sighing, Tony pulled Peter close to him again, “Can I ask FRIDAY what you’re making?”

Peter stayed silent for a long time, and Tony let him. The silence of the room eating away at him, his face stained with tears and his body numb. Finally, he spoke softly, “FRIDAY, cancel Hush Hush protocol.”

FRIDAY responded, “Protocol cancelled,”

Tony took that as his response, “What is the chemical we’re sitting in, Fri?”

“It is C-19 H-28 O-2, better known as Testosterone.”

Peter felt Tony freeze for a second, and took that as a chance to pull away, being sure to not look at Tony, “ _I’m sorry_ ,” Peter whispered, “I lied to you, Mr. Stark. I failed making this, and I failed _you_. I thought I could do it and - and -”

Tony put a gently hand on Peter’s face and guided him to look at him, “Pete,” He said slowly, and Peter looked for the anger in his eyes, but he couldn’t find it, no matter how hard he looked. He saw worry, he even saw the loving look that Tony would always have when he looked at him, “Are you transgender?” Peter nodded, feeling the tears coming again, he mumbled his sorry’s again, but Tony hushed him and pulled him close to him again.

They stayed that way, Peter kept trying to apologize, but every time Tony hushed him. Eventually, he gave up and just allowed Tony to hold onto him, where they stayed for a few minutes before Tony finally exhaled, “You didn’t have to hid this from me, Underoos. If I knew what you were doing, what you _needed_ , I could have helped.”

Peter squirmed and Tony allowed him to sit up to look at him, “You don’t have to pretend like you’re not disgusted in me, Mr. Stark.” He said softly, “I lied to you - about what I was doing in this lab - about - about all of this. I promise, I’ll pack up and be out of your hair in an hour.”

“Woah, no. No, absolutely not.” Tony’s voice turned stern, his rare _adult voice_ , holding Peter in his place, “You aren’t getting kicked out because of this. Pete, I want to _help you_ , I am not going to throw you to the curb. I just -” Tony sighed, “I just wish you would have something _sooner_.”

Peter was looking for anything in Tony’s face to say he was telling a lie, but he saw nothing, “But - I’m-”

“Still my Peter Parker, the smartest kid I’ve ever met, who also happens to be one of the most badass superheroes out there,” Tony grinned, “Next to Iron Man, of course.” A small snort came from Peter, and Tony’s face lit up, “I promise you, kid, we’ll figure this out together.” Peter nodded and Tony started to stand up, “But first, we need to get you into some new clothes.”

Looking down, Peter’s jeans were soaked through and he saw Tony’s were, as well. His mentor held out a hand to pull him up, and Peter paused before taking it, “You really aren’t disappointed in me being trans, Mr. Stark?”

“ _Of course not_ , Pete.” He responded, “Boy, girl, something else, I don’t care. That doesn’t stop you from being _you_ .” Peter took his hand and Tony hauled him to his feet, he immediately had to put his arm around Tony’s shoulder, when his legs decided they didn’t want to hold him up. The mess he had made had taken a lot out of him, and his body was just _exhausted_. It also didn’t help that the floor was covered in all the liquid chemicals that had spread as he broke the vials on the floor, “I got you Peter.” Tony said softly, wrapping a secure arm around Peter’s waist to keep him up right, “I got you.”

 

* * *

Peter woke up the next morning in his bedroom in the towers, the night before he had gotten a phone call from May saying that she would have to be working the skeleton crew at her job and if he could stay with Tony. After the intensity of his mentor finding out, he had been exhausted, he had changed clothes before passing out only getting up when Tony woke him to get some dinner, before he knocked right back out again. Even now, as he woke up, he still felt mentally tired. His body had healed from his fit of rage, but he knew that there were conversations coming today with his mentor that he didn’t think he would ever be ready for.

In the back of his mind, though, he knew he had to get up. With a check at his phone he saw it 11:42 in the morning, his stomach growled as he sat up. Sighing, he wandered off into the bathroom, grabbing his binder and a random shirt and pants from the clothes to take a quick shower. When he got out, he headed into the hallways and ended up in the kitchen and made some eggs and toast. Just as he sat down to eat, Tony came into the room, “Hey Pete, how you feeling?”

Peter nodded, not looked at Tony, “Fine,” He mumbled, but his voice was scratchy.

“Yeah, you definitely don’t sound like it.” Tony snorted, sitting across from him, “Want to try that one again?”

“I just-” Peter focused on his bread, “I haven’t had to come out to anyone in _months_ , I forgot how terrible it was.”

Tony hummed for a second, seemingly trying to decide if he wanted to say something, before he finally just said, “So, do you want to talk about it - what happened yesterday?” Peter shrugged in response. With a sigh, Tony tried again, “I’m not mad about the lab, if that’s what this is about. I got it all cleaned, already.”

Peter’s head shot up to look at his mentor, “You - _what_ \- that was - my mess - I should have cleaned it.”

Tony smiled, “Got you to look at me,” before waving Peter off, “Anyway, it wasn’t a big deal kid, you have to be careful cleaning up chemical spills - and since you spent most of the time soaking in it, I didn’t want you more exposed then you had to be.”

Although Peter wanted to argue more, he could tell that Tony would keep telling him not to worry about it, so he dropped it. Instead, he grabbed the toast and nibbled on it for a moment, “Can we - _not_ talk about it right now?”

“‘Course,” Tony nodded, before he snagged another slice of toast that was on Peter’s plate, to which Peter called out a “hey!” and his mentor just grinned, “I got a phone call from your Aunt this morning - she’s okay-” He said hurriedly when Peter looked worried, “She didn’t want to wake you, but she wanted you to know you can stay here this weekend - if you want. She picked up another shift for this afternoon.”

“I -” Peter thought of Ned and MJ and the plans they had set for Sunday, “well-”

“I’m not forcing you,” Tony said quickly, but Peter could tell that he wasn’t expecting a push back from Peter, “I just wanted to toss the offer out there.

Peter shook his head, “I love being here, Mr. Stark, it’s just - I have plans with my friends for tomorrow. We’re going to the movies.”

“That’s fine,” Tony responded, “I’m not keeping you trapped here all weekend, it’s just so you have somewhere to be with adult supervision, because we all know you need it.”

Sticking his tongue out, Peter smirked, “Rude.”

Tony waved him off, “You know it’s true, Pete.”

Peter let a pause happen, before nodding, “Then yeah, I’d like that.”

Tony grinned, “Good,” He stood up, “Now we should get you some actual food because _eggs and toast_ , really Pete? You’re going to be hungry in about twenty minutes with that metabolism of yours.”

“Doesn’t help you stole one of my toasts.” Peter responded.

Taking a bite of the bread, Tony said with his mouth full, “Who? Me?”

Peter rolled his eyes at his mentor.

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~  


The two of them spent most of the day out and about, and when the night started to fall, they ended back up in the tower, sitting around in the lounge area. Peter was fairly sure no one else was on the level, the only two people he had seen were Rodney and Pepper Potts, but he hadn’t seen them in a few hours now. There was something playing on TV in front of them, but Peter wasn’t paying much attention to it.

Peter and Tony were sitting on the same couch in the living room, Peter had his back against the armrest of the couch, his legs stretched out and resting on Tony’s lap, head laying on the back of the sofa as he scrolled through his phone. Tony was sitting much more normally, one hand resting on the arm rest while his other hand was making motions in the air, as Tony was reacting to something that Peter couldn’t see - probably coming from his glasses, legs up on a coffee table in front of him.

If Peter could define content with a single moment in his life, it would be this. He knew that Tony was listening if he wanted to say anything, he was a wizard at multitasking, and if Peter had anything to say, Tony would drop everything for him. A small smile found his lips, as Peter took in that this was his life now. Even after everything that happened yesterday, the monumental coming out Peter had, Tony didn’t leave him. He was still there.

“Hey, Mr. Stark,” Peter said, before he even realized he was going to say anything.

As expected, Tony stopped and gave his full attention to him, “Yeah kid?”

Peter hesitated for the smallest of seconds before deciding he should just get it out, “Thank you, for - for _everything_ . Letting me be here, giving me the suit, being so _accepting_ \- it means more than I could tell you.”

Tony leaned over and ruffled Peter’s hair, “I always told you, kid, anything for you.” He pulled back and shook his head, “Now, enough, I don’t do the emotional stuff.”

Grinning, Peter didn’t push it anymore, because he genuinely didn’t want to make Tony uncomfortable, so he let the silence fill in around them. Shooting a text to his Ned and MJ to update the plans for tomorrow, since Tony offered to drive him back into Queens earlier in the day. He had updated Ned in the morning about what had happened, but asked not to get into it anymore then that. The group chat with the three of them had been going off all day, but Peter had mostly just been sending memes in response to whatever either of them were saying until a full on meme war started. He wrote them for a while before Ned sent him a private message asking how he was actually holding up. Peter told him they could talk about it in person tomorrow, before putting his phone down and sighing, which caused Tony to look over at him, “What’s up, Underoos?”

“Can we talk about - what happened yesterday?” Peter asked, his voice becoming small, as he took his legs off of Tony’s lap and pulled into himself.

“Of course,” Tony responded, turning easily to face him, “What do you want to talk about it?”

Peter bit his lip, “Do you - did you really - would you help me find a formula that works?”

Tony nodded, “Absolutely.” He gave Peter a small smile, “I was already looking into it last night, actually. I may have had Fri tell me what you were up to the last few months to make sure I wasn’t trying to do that same thing you tried.”

“And you found other ways?” Peter asked slowly, unsure if he should allow his excitement to grow.

“A few, but I’ll admit, you covered a lot of ground with the way you were trying.” Tony responded, “My first handful of ideas kept getting shot down as FRIDAY told me you already tried them.”

Peter couldn’t stop the excitement, “You think some of them may work?”

Tony nodded, “I can be hopeful, at least. But-” Peter felt himself deflate at that, and Tony powered through, obvious with the deflation, “I should say while I’m an overall genius, I do know someone who would be better suited for this job. We could get around you having to come out on either front, if you wanted, but I did just want to throw the offer out there.”

“ _Either front_ ?” Peter repeated, “What do you mean? _Who_ do you mean?”

“Spider-Man or being trans.” Tony explained, “I was thinking... Bruce Banner.”

Peter’s jaw dropped, he was one of the few Avengers that Peter hadn’t met at all, he never crossed paths in the Tower and Peter hadn’t fought him as he had with the Rogue Avengers, “ _Dr. Bruce Banner_ ,” Peter repeated slowly, “You still have contact with him? He’s around?” He was a _legend_ in the science community, “You think he would _help_?”

Tony smiled at Peter’s excitement, “I hear from him occasionally, he’s off with Thor doing something or another, but he has mentioned wanting to come back a few times, for a visit at least. Yes, I think he would be up for helping.”

“That’s - oh my god - Dr. Bruce Banner - I can’t believe - but-” He looked at Tony, excitement dropping again, “Why would he want to help someone like - like _me_?”

Tony rolled his eyes and sighed, “If anyone understands what it’s like to be trapped in a body that doesn’t feel like theirs, I think Bruce would be the best for that.”

Peter’s face turned red and he ducked to hid it, “Yeah - I think - good - yes.”

He could hear Tony laugh softly, “I’ll contact him and let you know what he says, okay?” Peter nodded, looking up at Tony, “First thing first, though, what would you like me to tell him about you?”

“I - umm - whatever you think is best.” Peter stuttered out, “I’m okay with him knowing that I’m Spidey and trans. It’ll help him understand my chemical makeup a little bit more, that way.”

Tony nodded, leaning over and squeezing Peter’s shoulder, “I’ll go and make some phone calls to get in touch with him, then.”

Peter nodded, as Tony got up and wandered out of the room. Peter watched him leave and waited until he heard his footsteps fade away before he covered his face and gave out a little squeak, _Bruce Banner_ and _Tony Stark_ were going to help him get back on track with his hormones, and if that wasn’t the best news Peter had ever gotten, he didn’t know what was.

He thought back to just how worried he had been not thirty-two hours ago, and wished he could tell that Peter that everything was going to be alright. He had the two smartest people on his side, and _everything was going to be alright_.

**Author's Note:**

> Don't look too closely to find a spot that this would theoretically fit in the timeline, because it doesn't. I just love Trans!Peter and this wouldn't leave me alone, so here you go. 
> 
> Also, I don't know that much about the MCU -I've seen like four of the movies - I just know that I love my Spider-son, and his Iron Dad.


End file.
